Sister Space

Sisters feeling besieged

By Laila Muhammad | Last updated: Oct 14, 2014 - 9:43:14 PM

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“Neither shalt thou make marriages with them; thy daughter thou shalt not give unto his son, nor his daughter shalt thou take unto thy son. For they will turn away thy son from following me, that they may serve other gods: so will the anger of the LORD be kindled against you, and destroy thee suddenly. ~ Deuteronomy 7: 3-4

I don’t watch a lot of TV. But when I saw the previews for the new show, starring one of my favorite actresses Viola Davis, I was elated. Not only was the title catchy—How To Get Away With Murder—but finally a TV show that presents a Black woman that wasn’t a maid or mistress, she was an educated, professional, so I couldn’t wait until its debut.


Lo and behold, her character was married to a White man and having an affair with a Black man. (Can someone say Scandal rehashed?) I was so disgusted.

I know some will say well it’s just entertainment; it’s just a TV show. I beg to differ. The subliminal messages that are constantly being fed to us minute after minute have a profound effect on how we view the world, people, products, the government, and most importantly ourselves.

I refuse to believe that commercials, movies, sitcoms, and a myriad of other outlets portraying interracial couples are just happenstance. No sir, No ma’am. Out of the numerous films that have come out in the past 10 years, how many has showcased the Black man as the hero?

 How many successful Black women are shown married to decent Black men? And the ones that are married are shown as financially supporting Black men who sit at home, unemployed, watching TV, or playing video games. The movie industry, and the Jewish moguls who are responsible for what hits major screens, are trying to destroy the Black man, his image, and the Black family.

In an April 11, 1994 “Let Us Make Man (Part 4)” message delivered by the Honorable Minister Louis Farrakhan he said that “Our community is filled with envy, jealousy, strife, contention, bitterness, frustration, hatred, murder, because we are unfulfilled as men.  This is because racist White America cannot stand to see a Black man really “free,” full of The Power of God; with a creative mind at work, with a help-meet by his side working to develop creative ideas for the advancement of his family and his people!  So, since “two things cannot occupy the same space at the same time”:  If “the White male” is going to rule, then he must crush “the Black male.”


“Brothers: You are programmed, right now, for total destruction.  When the enemies of our rise can put out a movie called Boyz ’n The Hood, and show us to the world at our worst behavior…  When they put a movie out called Menace II Society, and you see your brothers pistol-whip a Korean woman, reach over the counter, shoot her; and then go home and take a video tape of it, and sit down and laugh at it—and you’re in the movie theatre, laughing at it too:  White folk have sent that movie all over the world.  And do you know what’s being done?  White people all over the world, and your own Black brothers, are looking at you through the lens of a movie camera, and they are saying:  “My God!  Black people are terrible.”

Talking to Black women from different walks of life, the common reason why they date White men was “the pool of Black men to choose from is so shallow.” And I honestly had to take a non-emotional look at what they were saying. Even in my own family, there is so much interracial dating, marriages, and mixed children being born that we might not recognize what’s happening.

No. 1. When they ask where are all the Black men, you needn’t look any further past your local jail or prison. Not justifying criminal activity, but we know that Black men are unfairly incarcerated at alarming rates for petty crimes as opposed to their Caucasian counterparts.

No. 2. It would seem through careful observation in any major city in America that so many of our brothers have decided to switch teams, and everywhere you look gay has become the new Black. We now have terminology like “homo thugs” and uncovering brothers on the “down low.”

No. 3. Now we have those successful, educated Black men who think attaining success is integrating into White society and marrying a White woman with hopes of being accepted into that world. Newsflash: They will never accept you as one of their own, no matter how many mixed children you produce, or how much money you make for them. They are simply trying to destroy you Black man, and get their seed into the Hereafter.

What is a Black woman to do? She works hard, attends her religious meetings faithfully, pays her tithes, takes care of her children, only to find that a potentially equal mate in her own race is already married, gay, or dating outside his race. What advice would you give her? She is constantly bombarded by images and subliminal messages telling her that the world is post racial, and will accept the idea of her marrying and procreating outside her race. She is constantly battling with the idea, knowing that she will be losing something if she gives up on the Black man. She might try to justify it by saying, well at least I looked for one, gave plenty of Black men chances, and it wasn’t successful.

To play Devil’s Advocate, the sad fact is that in a lot of Black homes, the men have abandoned and mistreated Black women, sometimes starting with her own father. Until the atonement process starts between the Black man and woman, we will perpetuate a culture like this. My biological sister told me right before she married her Caucasian husband, “I got tired of kissing frogs, I’m getting older, and I want more children, I tried dating Black men, and they just weren’t right.” There was nothing I could say to convince her otherwise, and believe me, I tried.

We as Black women love the Black man, and we know that this devilish and wicked government is out to destroy you, but you are destroying yourselves when you bypass the Black woman and marry a White one. What is a sister, a Black woman to do? How does she combat the negative images portrayed of you, when oft times she’s living the reality? Inquiring minds want to know.

A question was asked to Minister Farrakhan, and he responded in an address delivered on the 16th Anniversary of the Million Man March: “Farrakhan, do you think we should integrate, or do you think we should separate? Or do you think we should have some of both?” The Minister answered; How is that possible? You know, The Enemy is so smart, because he uses a trick called “integration.”  “Question: Do you really belong? Well, what kind of integration do you have? Is it that you now can sleep with White women and men, and they don’t kill you as quick as they used to?

May Allah (God) Bless us to rebuild the Black family by marrying unto our own. May he heal the wounds between Black men and women, that we may leave a legacy of love, respect,  duty and admiration  in our children that come from these unions.

(Laila Muhammad is a Final Call production assistant, writer, and videographer based in Chicago. Follow her, to purchase her paperback or eBook “Coffee makes you Black … so pour me some more,” go to